Going Short by Nancy Stohlman: A Mum Life Success Story

15/10/2020Jo Caddy

I must say I’m very excited about this particular Mum Life Success Story. I’ve had the pleasure of featuring some truly beautiful, amazing and inspiring Mums through these Mum Life Success Stories and each one of them has had a unique and special story to tell, but never have I featured someone as well-known and accomplished as Nancy Stohlman.

I have to admit that when I received an email from her publicity manager, about promoting her new book Going Short: An Invitation to Flash Fiction I didn’t actually know who she was. That is due more to my lack of time to read and search out great authors (because I’m busy with work, family and this blog) than it is about Nancy’s reputation. Once I googled her name, and announced the upcoming interview on twitter etc, I realised that Nancy was fastly becoming a household name.

After just a little research I discovered that Nancy was not only a talented performer, writer and professor, but that she was juggling it all with motherhood and so naturally, I had to request an interview for the next ‘Mum Life Success Story’ feature. Nancy happily obliged and answered all my probing questions about life, success and family and how she navigates it all. I was truly inspired and knew without a doubt that all of you would be inspired too. If by some off-chance you don’t know who Nancy Stolman is, let’s start with a bit of backstory direct from her publicity manager.

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Who is Nancy Stohlman?

Nancy Stohlman is the author of four books of flash fiction including Madam Velvet’s Cabaret of Oddities (a finalist for a 2019 Colorado Book Award), The Vixen Scream and Other Bible Stories (2014), and The Monster Opera (2013). She is the creator of The F-bomb Flash Fiction Reading Series and FlashNano in November. Her work has been anthologized in the W.W. Norton New Micro: Exceptionally Short Fiction, Macmillan’s The Practice of Fiction, and The Best Small Fictions 2019. Her craft book, Going Short: An Invitation to Flash Fiction, is forthcoming from Ad Hoc Fiction in 2020. She teaches writing and rhetoric at the University of Colorado Boulder.

When she is not writing flash fiction she straps on stilettos and becomes the lead
singer of the lounge metal jazz trio Kinky Mink. She lives in Denver Colorado and dreams of one day becoming a pirate.

Going Short: An Invitation to Flash Fiction

Going Short: An Invitation to Flash Fiction is Nancy’s latest contribution to the world of literature. Writer and Teacher Kathy Fish describes it as “The definitive, and appropriately concise book on the flash fiction form”. I have read some of the book myself and I can say Kathy is right, If you’re a writer (as many of my readers are) or want to start writing, Going Short: An Invitation to Flash Fiction is a resource you want to have on your bookshelf.

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Mum Life Success Story

With Nancy being the seasoned writer that she is and needing no help from me to tell her story, I decided to publish this feature in interview format rather than the story form I usually employ. First I asked Nancy to tell us a little bit about her family.

Tell us a little about your family?

I have two kids—Maiya is 22 and just got her first apartment; Felix is 15 and just got his learner’s permit (yikes!). My partner Nick and I have been together almost a dozen years. We’re all creatives: Nick is a classical pianist and Maiya is a visual artist, so I’m proud to have passed down a family value of artistry. My own parents were also creative; I remember musical jam sessions, a lot of clowning in my household growing up.

When did your love for writing begin?

I remember I was 10 years old on the bleachers at a soccer game when I announced I was going to become an author. I was a voracious reader, of course. I grew up on military bases overseas, so books were my constant friends through all the moving and the various cultural and language barriers. After my author announcement my mother let me use her electric typewriter and I wrote a musical: Superman, The Musical (ala Christopher Reeve). I felt so important as I sat there clicking the keys, feeding in the paper. I don’t know what happened to the musical, but I still feel the magic when I sit down to write.

What inspired you to write your upcoming publication ‘Going Short’?

I was inspired to write Going Short about 10 years ago, when students and fellow writers kept asking me to recommend flash fiction craft books. I didn’t know what to recommend—there were almost no craft books aimed at this growing genre (nor by women). So I decided to take it on myself. I thought it would be easy, something I could write in a year or two. Ha. It took me almost 8 years! But I’m extremely proud of the result—I hope this book becomes a friend to the writers and readers who fall in love with flash fiction.

Are there any major obstacles you’ve had to overcome to get where you are now?

Oh yes. Self doubt. Fear. Creative deserts. Jealousy. Self-sabotage. It’s not easy to go for your dreams. There’s so much risk. Every step you think you might be crazy. Every step you expose yourself to…all of it. Not everyone is rooting for you, so you have to cheer yourself on no matter what. It’s not always easy. It takes courage and bravery, not just one time but every time. Over and over. So my challenge is to reach deeper and keep finding that courage. It’s either that or give up—which keeps me motivated on the hard days.

Are there any funny, intense, or inspiring stories you can tell us about your experiences in writing and/or publishing?

For years I fantasized of spending “three weeks on an island all by myself just writing.” Sounds magical, right? Then, last year, I decided to do it. I was already in Italy co-hosting a flash fiction retreat (so amazing), and when it was over I found a super remote island in the Adriatic, rented a renovated wine cellar for $150 a week, and went on my own sabbatical. And I wrote every day. Every blissful day. I mean, I woke up, I wrote, I walked to get coffee, I wrote. I ate gelato, I walked to the empty beach. I wrote. It was magical, and I discovered what I call Holy Boredom. And because of it, I finished this book.

What would you say is your biggest challenge with balancing family life with your career? How do you find balance (if you do)?

Funny, but I think this question is part of the challenge—if I were a man I would likely never be asked this question. Because I’m a woman, there’s an expectation (even from myself) that I can and will do it all: be a loving mother, chef, teacher, partner, friend, housekeeper, nurture all my relationships…oh, AND write books, teach on campus, run retreats, and attempt to dream my own inspiration into being. And, because all women are amazing, we do it. All of it. But I like to envision a world where men are asked this question, too.

The short answer of how I balance it all? I fail. I succeed. Then I fail. I do my best. And sometimes I schedule a weekend to myself and that’s important, too.

How does your experience as a Mother help with your writing and vice versa?

Once I had kids I knew the luxury of waiting for the muse, was over. If I really wanted to be a writer, I had to begin now—there was a little person watching me. So I wrote during nap time and in the evenings after bedtimes. I mean, I wrote entire books during nap times, during pre-school. Later I wrote on trains and buses while commuting to campus. I learned to seize THIS moment, imperfect but available, because the perfect moment is just an illusion. So in a very real way my children forced me to get serious and make it happen.

And writing makes me a better mother, too, because I’m honoring that creative part of myself. I’m more present for my family when I’m present for myself. Put on your own oxygen mask before you help others.

What advice can you give to other women (mothers in particular) wanting to chase their dreams of becoming a professional writer?

Just begin. The perfect time, the perfect location, the perfect idea—you could be waiting forever. The real day-to-day of writing is messy—there is nothing idealized about it. And yet, allowing yourself to be creative is amazingly, imperfectly perfect. On a good day, it’s still just as magical to me as that first time at my mom’s electric typewriter.

Plus, the very best thing you can do for your children is to show them what it looks like to not give up on yourself. They will be watching and learning from your actions far more than from your words.

Thanks

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HURD & CO – A Mum Life Success Story

30/11/2019Jo Caddy

Hey everyone, I’m finally back. 3 weeks of sick kids, sleep deprivation and no time for anything has finally ended and I have a day off to get some writing done. Procrastination has stolen my morning but my determination to bring you this months Mum Life Success Story has finally won out and here I am typing, typing, typing with a thousand thoughts running through my head about what I need to get done for Christmas and my sons second birthday on the weekend.

Isn’t that just a typical Mum Life Story though? I mean, there’s always so many things to do and to organise, it’s a never ending juggling act of priorities and responsibilities that go through seasonal ups and downs where we sometimes have it all together and perfectly balanced and other times we have to put some priorities on pause while we attend to the most important responsibilities in our lives.

What’s important is that we don’t let those momentary deviations reroute us, but we get back on the horse so to speak and get back to juggling and balancing our butts off! Perseverance is the key if we want to succeed in those goals we have, to make our dreams a reality. Perseverance and hard work, nothing can beat it!

One lady who’s perseverance and hard work has seen her, in her own words, evolve from a table top scarf seller to an influential ethical fashion brand, is Dawn Hurd, founder of Hurd & Co. Dawn is basically a one-woman fashion store. The designer, the maker, the marketing department, admin department, finance department, etc, etc and her hand-made products are winning awards and getting her noticed in the world of ethical business.

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About Dawn

Dawn Hurd lives in Somerset, England with her husband, affectionately known as Mr. H, (whom she started dating when she was 17) and their 3 children, Joshua 16, Jake 11 and Olivia 10. She is 46, a wife, a mum, a part time admin assistant for her husbands construction business and a mumtrepreneur.

Dawn didn’t always know what her business would be one day but she always had an entrepreneurial spirit. She says “I grew up in a small village in Somerset surrounded by family and open fields. I scrumped apples, played in hay barns, scuffed my knees and rode horses. I started my first business when I was 13 making and selling jewellery to holiday makers from the local pub.”

After leaving school, she couldn’t settle “I worked in a yoghurt factory, I picked peas, I drove a 7 ½ tonne lorry for parcel force, I worked as a cashier, a cleaner and a barmaid before settling as a lifeguard, then Gym Manager and eventually started a successful Fitness & Lifestyle Consultancy.”

Dawn loved the fitness side of her business and business was booming with 3 local council contracts as a GP Referral Coordinator. “I worked as a link between the GP’s, referring patients with medical conditions like asthma, angina, arthritis, diabetes, etc. I worked to educate them and increase their confidence so they could get into mainstream gyms. I did a bit of cardiac rehabilitation work also, which I loved.”

A Change of Trajectory

Things were going really well, but sometimes life can throw us a curveball and we are forced to change our trajectory in a completely different direction. “Due to 8 miscarriages, I was advised to stop exercising as my doctor felt I was over doing it. We have since discovered, due to a bone fracture, that I have Coeliac Disease causing malnutrition which caused the miscarriages as well as Osteoporosis.”

So the fitness side of things had to be scaled right down, but just three months later she was pregnant again, this time with her son who is now sixteen years old. Dawn turned her attention toward her family and became a stay-at-home mum, but the entrepreneur in her could not be silenced and she ended up running a craft business called Ribbons and Rosebuds.

But it wasn’t until 2016 and three beautiful children later, that the opportunity would present itself for her now successful, ethically sustainable business. “In early 2016 a friend popped in for lunch. She spotted a scarf I had made and asked me to make fifteen scarves for an upcoming fashion show she was assisting with. They sold out. This was the beginning of Hurd & Co. I managed to convince my husband this was a good idea, he gave me £400 which I have since paid him back…….with interest.”

As most mums know, juggling a family, work and a life is no easy task and finding the dreaded ‘B’ word can sometimes be an exercise in futility. I always ask my interviewee’s how they find balance and the answers are always different. For Dawn, balance takes the form of ‘self care’. “I ‘attempt’ to dress in workout gear every morning for the school run so that when I return I have no distractions from getting onto my mountain bike and cycling every morning straight from school……However this does take second, third, fourth place more than it should. On days where I need head space I head to the nearest woodland. I cannot describe how at peace I feel when I’m surrounded by trees and nature, it’s a good place for me to be. I also feel a huge amount of pressure to inspire my children, especially my daughter, I want them to see that hard work really pays off. They are the Co. in Hurd & Co and they help me whenever they can.”

Three years later, Dawn has a whole range of products and her business is championing conscious fashion. On her website, you’ll see that Hurd & Co are committed to providing a sustainable, ethical business model in accordance with the United Nations Sustainable Development Goals. So not only is her business becoming more successful, but it is playing a huge role in reducing the environmental footprint of the production industry.

This success is now being recognised by the industry.

“In early September this year I headed up to the NEC in Birmingham to the Spring Fair to receive an award for Fashion Accessory of the Year ‘Made in Britain’ category, from the BTAA (British Travel goods Handbags & Accessories Association). It is the greatest highlight for the business so far. I still catch myself smiling in disbelief that I actually won, I am thrilled to bits.”

Obstacles

I asked Dawn what the biggest obstacle was in moving forward in the business and how she overcomes it and she said “My biggest obstacle is lack of funds, however, this has always been my largest hurdle and up to now through determination, creativity, collaboration and hard work I have managed, on a shoestring, to grow the business. I shall continue with the belief that if I work hard enough for it I will achieve it and although it may take me a little longer to get to the point where I have a large enough budget to invest in my business I am under no illusion that there will ever be enough money in the budget because there will always be opportunities requiring cash investment. Sales equal income, so for now I need to get my head down and keep knitting.

I believe Dawn is an awesome example of how perseverance and determination can turn opportunities into successes. Dawn didn’t get where she is because of a university degree, or lot’s of cash or a huge following on social media. She is where she is because she believed it could happen and she took the opportunity when it came and worked hard to make it happen.

The Future

Dawns business is already involved in some great causes, she is an official supporter for the Campaign for Wool, she supports the Global Goals for Sustainable Development and 10% of her customers purchases are directly donated to the mental health charity MIND. When I asked her where she saw herself and the business in 5 years, she said that in 5 years she will:

Have set up community Sit & Knit sessions for elderly people living in rural communities who are suffering with loneliness, isolation or depression issues. Welcoming them to gather together to drink tea, eat cake, knit and natter in a safe environment where they can share any worries, concerns laughs and tears all funded by Hurd & Co.
Have donated a minimum of £1000 to charities dealing with loneliness, isolation and depression.
I will have a team, a group of women employees knitting my collections allowing me the time to develop the business.
I will be mentoring other women hoping to start their journey to running their own successful business.

I can’t wait to interview her again in 5 years and see if she has indeed reached all these goals but I am sure that she will have not only reached them but far exceeded them.

Advice

Dawn‘s advice for anyone looking at delving into the world of mumtrepreneurship (should definitely be a word) is “Download the Youtube app. Being a mumtrepreneur can be an extremely lonely place where ‘Imposter Syndrome’ creeps into my head daily. I am constantly listening to motivational speakers, podcasts, ‘how to’ tutorials etc.
My time, like yours, is so very precious, so if whilst I’m making beds or hoovering I can have my earphones on with Tony Robbins motivating me to believe in my abilities, to work for my goals or Jasmine Star explaining how to nail social media or an SEO ‘how to’ tutorial to educate myself to take the business further, I come away feeling I have been super productive with my time and I feel inspired to give the business my all for another day. I have had some huge failures which have eventually resulted in lots of lessons of what not to do, so that eventually I can learn from my mistakes and start again. Having the school of You Tube behind me assists me in learning for free.”

When it comes down to it, no one’s story is exactly the same. We all have obstacles to overcome, failures to learn from, fear to fight and losses to recoup, but if we stay the course, learn from our experiences and never give up, we can accomplish anything.

If you’d like to see Dawn’s work, you can visit her website www.hurdandco.com or follow her on Instagram.

“Failure doesn’t bother me, fear and regret do.” ~ Dawn Hurd

Thanks

Thank you for reading this blog, if you’d like to have your story featured just like Dawn’s, please email us at mumlifestories@gmail.com

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Cassy’s Cafe: A Mum Life Success Story

28/09/2019Jo Caddy

If there is one thing I love about the invention of the internet, it’s that I can interview someone on the other side of the world and write a story about them without even leaving my own house. Heck, I don’t even have to talk to them on the phone, I simply do what I do best and write to them, and they write back. How amazing is that? I love that it’s so easy to connect with new people, people that I wouldn’t otherwise ever have a chance to meet or get to know.

Through the stories that I’ve been privileged to write in the last several months, I’ve met some amazing women, women who are pushing past the obstacles and setbacks that life inevitably throws their way and chasing those elusive dreams that so many people talk about but so little achieve. These women have inspired me and I hope inspired you also.

One such lady who’s positive attitude to life caught my attention on Instagram (@lifeofcassy2019) is Cassandra Sojka.

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Immigration of Cassy

This months ‘Mum Life Success Story’ Mum, comes all the way from The Gambia (otherwise known as ‘The Smiling Coast of Africa’). Cassandra Sojka, originally from Stockholm Sweden, moved to The Gambia in 2013 where she now owns and runs a successful Cafe/Restaurant (Cassy’s Cafe) with her Husband Ladislav. They have two children, Aiden (5) and Mio (3).

If you’re asking the question ‘where the heck is The Gambia?’ your not alone. Cassy admitted to me that she needed to check a map before going on a family holiday there in 2011 because she had no idea where this country was. I myself had to google it and discovered that it’s actually the smallest country within mainland Africa. It occupies a small sliver of land around the Gambia River and is almost entirely surrounded by Senegal with the exception of its western coastline along the Atlantic Ocean (Wikipedia 2019). It’s best known for it’s subtropical climate, pristine beaches, and abundant birdlife, drawing tourists all-year-round.

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So why the Gambia?

Cassandra says “Ever since I was young I wanted to move from Sweden to another county. I didn’t know where to, when or how but it was just always my dream.” It was during her family holiday in 2011 that she fell in love with the country and didn’t want to go home when the two weeks were up. “My sister and I booked a single ticket back to the Gambia only a few days after we got home. During our 1, 5-month stay we met a lot of new people and my sister got a job offer. I convinced her to stay as she could just return home to Sweden if she didn’t like it.” It was obviously some good advice as she still lives in the Gambia now.“

Cassy travelled back and forth, as much as she could, at times working 6 jobs in Sweden in order to save for the trips. “My sister was there and also the man that would become my husband. We were not in a relationship yet but we loved spending time together. In 2013 we decided to give our relationship a real try and I decided to move down to the Gambia permanently.”

They got engaged and Cassy got pregnant just 6 months after they decided. 3 years and 2 kids later they started thinking about how they could make an income without leaving the kids for long hours and making next to nothing because in the Gambia, salaries are bad and working hours are long. “The only thing that made sense with two young kids, was to open something of our own. We went back and forth on what we could do, what would work in this small, developing, beautiful country. A café and a restaurant were closing down in a complex and we decided to jump on the opportunity. We believed it was something the Gambia was missing. We had to act quick, so within two months after we decided, we were open.”

Obstacles

Cassandra says she still doesn’t know how they did it, without savings and so fast, but it just goes to show that it’s possible to do so much more than you think. “Both my husband and I are very spontaneous people. I’m also very positive so thinking that we would fail or that it wouldn’t work is nothing I remember even having in my mind.”

That’s not to say that there were no obstacles. Every huge life decision, especially when you have a family, comes with a certain amount of hurdles that need to be cleared before the race can be won. The 10 foot hurdles some people may see however, can seem more like 10mm if approached with a positive attitude and a determination to overcome.

“There were two obstacles when we were about to open the café. The first one was to leave the kids with a babysitter. To find someone to trust and to spend more time away from them. We just had to get used to the idea like anyone else that is going back to work. I brought the kids with the babysitter to the café a lot in the beginning.”

The second issue was money. For a while, they weren’t sure how they would be able to pay for everything they needed to open a café. “We asked a friend to help a bit and the rest just worked out” and they did make it work “after two months we expanded and after only a few months open we climbed up to number 1 on TripAdvisor and still remain there.”

After 2 years in operation, Cassy’s Cafè is a thriving business “it’s a hangout spot for a lot of different people, from local celebrities to teenagers and families. Coming to work makes me happy.”

Balance

That elusive question of “how do you find balance?” is always my favourite, probably because I struggle in this area and I’m always interested to hear how successful Mums manage it. “How do I balance life, kids, and business? Do I get tired? For sure! Is it worth it? Yes! I make sure to spend a lot of quality time with the kids both at home and out, I make sure we do a lot of fun things together.” Cassy admits that her energy isn’t always enough for the beach after work but it makes her happy. Seeing the kids happy, makes her happy.

I believe that scheduling quality time for relationships is an important aspect of finding balance between work and life. Cassy says “We have a babysitter two times a week so that my husband and I can have dinner and spend time together, even if it’s at work. What also works for me is to not have too many routines or too many plans. I like being spontaneous. I like being able to pick up the kids from school and together decide where we should go and how we should spend the afternoon. It’s the small things that make life good. Too many plans tend to stress me.”

The Future

When asked where she could see herself in 5 years, she replied “I hope the café is still as popular as today, if not more. I hope that we continue to grow and have one or two more businesses. I know it sounds like a lot but I believe it’s possible! I believe positive thinking really helps with whatever you want in life.”

Her advice to anyone thinking of starting their own business is to “Have a good partner. Especially if there are kids in the picture. It has to be someone you trust, that has the same goals as you. Someone that’s willing to work hard. For me, that’s my husband and that’s the biggest reason I manage the life I do and managed to stay happy. If it weren’t for him, I would have wanted to quit many times. We can believe that we can do it all on our own, but it’s also ok to admit we can’t!”

Whilst it’s not always possible to find that loving supportive partner, I agree that it’s a great idea to surround ourselves with positive people who are on board with our vision. Having someone there to lift us up when we stumble can sometimes be the difference between persevering and giving up.

What’s your dream for the future? Do you believe it’s possible? If not, why not? Drop a comment in the comment section below 🙂

If you’d like to follow Cassy’s family adventures, you can visit her account on instagram @lifeofcassy2019 or follow the success of her cafe @cassyscafe.

Going Short: An Invitation to Flash Fiction by Nancy Stohlman

Thanks

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EMPOWERED MUMTREPRENEUR: A Mum Life Success Story

31/08/2019Jo Caddy

Have you ever wondered what people mean by the term “Mumtrepreneur”? If your like me, you would assume it meant an entrepreneur who was also a mum, right? Of course we would be correct in that assumption, but I believe the subject of my latest Mum Life Success Story put a more accurately defined meaning on it when she told me that she didn’t really feel like an Entrepreneur “I am a mum who runs her own creative business” she said “I suppose you could call me a Mumtrepreneur, because my children come before my business”.

If your an Entrepreneur you know that running your own business is hard work, it takes passion, commitment, perseverance and a LOT of time. As a Mumtrepreneur you have to divide your time between your family and your new venture, in a masterful balancing act. Some of us can accomplish this with the effortless ease of a duck gliding on water and others of us sink to the bottom of the pond like a carelessly tossed pebble. Roslyn Whiting is a great example of the former (or perhaps she would say she’s somewhere in-between), running her own business (Roslyn Whiting Leathercraft), using traditional methods to make quality leather goods that are made to last!

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A Passion Ignited

Roslyn Whiting currently lives in the beautiful town of Melrose, in the Scottish Borders, with her husband and 2 children (13 & 11).

Hand-tooling leather is not a common craft in the UK. “I first learnt how to do leatherwork when I was 13 at a Christian youth camp (SEP Christian Activity Camp). Most of the activities were sport but I wasn’t very sporty so I decided to try Leatherwork. The first time I tried it, I found it hard. The tools were not easy to use and are totally different to anything I had used before. The second time I had a lesson, it clicked and I loved it”.

Although she enjoyed it, Roslyn doubted that she was any good. To her surprise she won an award at the camp and was both thrilled and inspired. “My confidence grew after winning the award and each year I got better and better and won more awards. It’s amazing what one bit of encouragement can do”.

Fast forward a couple of decades and a few years ago, Roslyn, her husband, and their two children went back to the youth camp to volunteer. She found herself helping out with the leatherwork activities and a passion was reignited. After finding out where she could get the tools, she decided that now was the time to start her creative business. “I had been a stay at home mum for over 5 years and as much as I loved it, I felt I needed to be creative again.”

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7 Years in the making

Roslyn has been running her business for 7 years now and has described the process as an interesting personal journey. “The first few years I was finding my feet, developing new products and going to every craft fair I could. I quickly discovered that not all craft fairs suited me as leather is an expensive product and some people are just looking to buy something small and cheap. However over time I have found the right places to sell my goods and my business has grown. I’ve worked hard and feel blessed to have had the opportunities and sales that I’ve had. I’m not a salesperson, a problem a lot of makers suffer from. We prefer to make our products than sell them.“

As her business grew, Roslyn found herself spending more and more time on it, squeezing in making products whenever she could. Then came the obstacles that forced her to change the way she worked.

Injuries started to happen, some due to the business and some not related at all. She could no longer make lots of small items at cheap prices. Eventually she realised that because she uses traditional methods, she “can’t” and “shouldn’t” be rushed. “It’s about applying my craftsmanship and taking my time over every stage to make the best quality products.”

She described this new direction of the business as very exciting. “I decided to create my own design of wallets and card holders, taking inspiration from the Eildon Hills that I can see from my workshop. I use top quality British calfskin for my wallets and I’m going to use leather from the last British tannery to use oak, to tan it’s leather for my belts. The oak is slow growing, therefore takes longer to tan (up to 14 months) and this makes a stronger leather.”

A turning point

Anyone who’s ever run a business would know that building a reputation and establishing a brand is a complex thing. In this age of information we live in, the options available for expansion and marketing etc can often become overwhelming as we weigh up the choices for which direction we should go in.

Roslyn was so excited about growing her business in a new direction that she began listening to a lot of different podcasts and following lots of coaches on social media. “They were saying lots of different things and my head was full of ‘noise’ and I didn’t know which way to go and how to run my business.”

Then everything changed. She woke up through the night in extreme pain and had to go to A&E.

“Well as you can imagine I prayed! My husband had to go back home to look after our children so I was alone. The pain eventually eased but they kept me in, to do tests. My first day in hospital one of my friends messaged me with a simple message ‘how is your year going?’ Wow, the one time when I needed a friend. She was a great help supporting me. I ended up having to have a major operation. That was me out of action for around 6 weeks. Then I got a large order from one of my main wholesaler which was just the encouragement I needed. It may take time but everything will work out.”

Empowered

I know from experience that there are often things that come across our path that seem small or irrelevant, that end up becoming opportunities or events that change our lives or looking back were instrumental in our growth. Roslyn had such an experience that changed her perspective in a positive way.

Roslyn explains that there was one final twist in her story. There was a book that she’d been thinking about buying for quite some time called ‘The Empowered Entrepreneur – Elizabeth Cairns‘ but had put off for various reasons. Just before she went to hospital she finally decided she would buy the book and see how it went.

The book happened to arrive just as Roslyn got out of hospital and provided a welcome distraction to her recovery. “It is one of the best books I have ever read. It was also great having the time to read it. The author talks about giving yourself time out and breaks to be creative, for example go for a walk in a wood. Scientists have proven that walking in woods and amongst trees helps your wellbeing. She spoke about things being bigger than us and that things will work out if we just wait for the right time. Because of my beliefs I would put God there. I realise this isn’t everyone’s beliefs, including the authors, but I found it helped me to be patient and wait for the perfect timing and it will work out.”

Roslyn explained that the author (Elizabeth Cairns) talks about taking things slowly, listening to your gut. We know our business better than anyone else, we are our business. We are all unique and therefore our businesses are unique and we deep down know the best way to run our business. “This released a huge weight off my shoulders. I had been watching so many other people on instagram and facebook that I wasn’t taking the time to be quiet and reflective to take into account my own intuition and passion to determine what direction I need to take my business.”

The Empowered Entrepreneur (Buy it Now)

Whilst Roslyn still doesn’t have her full energy back after the operation she is excited to know that she is now opening herself up to listen to where she needs to go. “Something that isn’t easy when our time gets eaten up by so much. People buy from people and want to know the person behind the photos on instagram and facebook. Because I now allow myself the freedom to run my business my way, it is easier for my customers to get to know me and build a rapport. I still listen to some podcasts but they tend to be more the testimonial type.”

Finding Balance

A question I ask all my Mum Life Success Story subjects is how do they find balance. “That’s an interesting question. I don’t think I manage it really. It’s not easy juggling being there for my children and making commissions, but is worth it. It is important to me to try and be there for my children. I work from home so if they’re ill, I’m able to look after them etc.”

Roslyn has a very supportive husband and two great children, who now understand that she needs time to work during their school holidays. She makes sure to take weekends off to spend with the family and if she receives emails in the evenings or weekends she either doesn’t reply until her working hours or tells them she’ll get back to them when she’s in the workshop.

Not everyone understands the difference between huge online retailers and individually run creative business’. “People have got so used to Amazon etc… where they’re open 24/7, they forget that there is a person behind the business, although this is why my customers buy from me and are great (I think I have the best customers).”

Roslyn knows that there are things she needs to pay more attention to and looking after herself is one of them. “I need to get better at taking breaks and going for walks during the day. I work within school hours and that makes it difficult.” I think all of us as Mums know how difficult it can be to fit in “me time” but also realise that it’s a vital part of maintaining that sense of self we can often lose in all the busyness and commitments to others, which can lead to Mum Life Burnout.

The Future

I asked Roslyn where she saw herself in 5 years time. “I want to be known and respected for making unique, quality leather goods that will last for years. I would like to have more sales through craft events and online shopping and continue to draw inspiration from my beautiful local countryside to make unique designs.”

Roslyn says her family still comes first, so she doesn’t go to events and crafts too far away from home. “I realise that I need to branch out further than the Scottish Borders. It is hard to know which events are good and where my ideal customer goes but I’m sure it will get easier as the children get older and my confidence grows.”

Advice for Mumtrepreneurs

Roslyn had this advice for mums thinking of starting their own creative business. “If you are thinking that you want to start your own business and still be around for your children, I would definitely say go for it. It is one of the best things I have ever done. Yes, it’s hard work but it is worth it. To still be there for the big moments in your child’s life but also to be creative is great.”

Finally “My biggest tip is to believe in yourself, give yourself quiet moments so you can listen to God (If that is your faith) and your instincts about where to take YOUR business.”

If you’d like to see Roslyn work, you can visit her store at https://roslynwhiting.co.uk/ or follow her on Facebook or Instagram.

Thanks

Thanks for reading another Mum Life Success Story. If you’d like your story to be featured on our blog, please check out our Mum Life Success Story T & C’s page or send us an e-mail at mumlifestories@gmail.com

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Fiona M. Jones: A Mum Life Success Story

11/04/201931/08/2021Jo Caddy

This months Mum Life Success story is all about one of our very own contributors, Fiona M. Jones. If you’ve been following me for a while you may have read some of her stories (Mud, Tiny Green Apples). If not, you really should check them out.

Fiona lives with her husband and 2 teenaged sons in Fife, Scotland, where she works, writes & ministers. Fiona writes very short things, including stories on Mannison Press and Monstracity, and essays on Wizards in Space and Folded Word. Her published work in fiction, CNF and poetry is linked through @FiiJ20 on Facebook and Twitter.

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Many Hats

Sometimes when we think about writers, we imagine them sitting at a desk in front of an attic window, typing away at an antique typewriter or computer, a set of glasses perched on their nose and a focused look of determination on their faces. Am I right, or is that just me? Well, however you imagine a writer, chances are their lives are often very different from what our mind illustrates to us. For example they often have to steal moments of time to create their writing because they have families and day jobs that fight to monopolise their day. Sometimes they can wear many hats, especially if they are a parent.

Apart from her writing, Fiona has 2 sons to take care of, is the wife of a Baptist Minister and is currently teaching French in 2 different primary schools. “At the moment I do one day a week teaching French in one primary school and two days a week with five-year-olds in another school, filling in for a teacher who is on long-term sick leave. Teaching French for the past two years has really extended my own second-language skills, but my favourite subject area is science/ecology. I get to do Outdoor Learning and an ongoing ‘Living Things’ topic with the five-year-olds, plus Family Learning (an opportunity for parents to come and join in with their children’s lesson once a week).”

Obstacles

As many Mothers (and people in general really) can relate, life is full of obstacles. Even though there are many out there (and Instagram will confirm) that seem to have it all together and be living the perfect life, the majority of us have trials and set backs that prevent us from running like a toddler from a nappy change, toward our dreams and goals for the future. Hopefully though we do not let these obstacles and set-backs overcome us. Fiona knows all to well that life is not always easy, having recently been through cataract operations on both eyes and being unwell for quite some time.

“I suffer from long-term post-viral fatigue, and find teaching quite exhausting, but there are advantages to being a supply teacher. For one thing, I generally have more freedom to teach my own ideas and techniques, and for another, the paperwork and admin commitments are lower. Supply teaching is flexible, too, which means that I can vary how much I work according to my health and my other commitments: family, relatives, church and so on.”

The Dream

Fiona has always dreamed of having a book published, maybe a collection of short stories. “I think my biggest obstacle to this is the current publishing market, with its expectation that authors should self-edit, self-publish and self-market their work. With my tendency to anxiety I am pretty sure this is not a path I could go down. During the next few years I want to find and establish what my “voice” is as a writer, and find my niche if it’s there. Somewhere along the way I would like to write devotionals; I used to contribute short scripture-based pieces to a church website, and I found it very satisfying.”

For the last sixteen years or so Fiona has been writing for church and community resources, but it is only in the last two years or so that she’s had the nerve to submit stories to publishers. “I have had some limited success here” she tells us humbly “ten stories accepted for pay and various other stories scattered widely around the Internet, pulled together on my public Facebook page. I hope that as my writing continues to improve, I will be able to earn enough money by it to justify doing stories when I should be doing housework.”

Apart from writing a book, Fiona hopes that in five years time she will still be riding her ancient Yamaha RXS-100, her children will be transitioning towards leaving home, and she and her husband will be able to travel more and spend time with farther relatives. “My husband is a Baptist minister, so I imagine my church commitments will also increase as time goes on, and I will remain part-time as a teacher.”

Balance

I always ask my mums how they find balance (if they do) between family, work and chasing their dreams. I am always pleasantly surprised to find that I am not alone in my struggles to reach the illusive concept. “I can’t claim to have got it right yet, but in the last ten years I’ve had to admit and adjust to my limitations in health, energy, etc. Working part-time seems to be the right way for me to go. I meet a surprising amount of subtle disapproval for only working part-time, but my children are always the first to tell me off for fretting about what other people think! In a way I like to think that they have learned from my mistakes. I love spending time with them, walking with my older son and listening to his explanations of the mathematical laws of the universe; and doing activities with my younger son, who has very broad interests and is always trying something new. I still read with them every night, some French, maybe a little short fiction, and always some Bible.”

The Institute by Stephen King (Buy it now)

Advice for Success

You’ve probably heard a lot of similar advice when it comes to achieving your goals and realising your dreams, ‘Just do it’ is a popular statement that comes to mind, along with ‘don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t’. Both are amazingly simple yet profound pieces of advice that I believe we should all hang our hats on but I really liked Fiona’s advice to anyone who might be thinking of chasing their dreams in a creative field.

“Always keep the creative side of yourself alive. Singing, drawing, writing, baking, sewing – whatever it may be. One day you will need it.”

If you’d like to hear more about Fiona or to read more of her stories, simply visit her Facebook page. To be featured as one of our Success Stories, please email us at mumlifestories@gmail.com and check out our T&C’s page for more info.

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Sara Impriano: A Mum Life Success Story

04/03/201921/07/2021Jo Caddy

We are redefining the word ‘Success’ here at Mum Life Stories. You don’t have to be a rock star, a celebrity with your name up in lights and 100k+ followers on Instagram. You don’t have to have a million dollars in the bank or have the whole world know your name. “Success” to us is getting up every day and taking care of business. It’s kicking goals and pushing toward your dreams. It’s not giving up or letting circumstances or other people prevent you from embracing the future you long for in your ‘heart’. For Sara Impriano, our latest Mum Life Success Story subject, “Success” means becoming the best version of herself. I spoke to Sara about how she achieved this goal and became an Independent Beachbody Coach!

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Small three-legged Cat planter in Orange Tabby

From Teaching to Training

Sara Impriano lives in West Chester, Pennsylvania (USA) with husband Eric and their three children, Brandon (11), Gracie (10) and Izzy (7). Sara spent 10 years as a 4th and 5th Grade Special Education teacher in an elementary school before leaving to give birth to her first child. Sara says “For the past 11 years, I have been a stay at home mom and have loved every minute of it. I feel so fortunate that I was able to be home with my children and be there for their first steps, first words, the first day of preschool and their first day of Kindergarten.” Once her children all began full-time school and Sara found herself at home alone all day long, she had what could only be described as an identity crisis. “To be honest, I was a little depressed. I had been rocking the wife and mom role for so long, who was I now that I didn’t have any little humans to take care of all day long?”

A New Opportunity

14 months ago Sara was given the opportunity to embark on a new adventure as a health and wellness coach. “Coaching happened to fall into my lap at the perfect time. I was already focusing more on fitness and my own health once I turned 40 but I knew I needed to find something to fill my cup up, something just for me outside of being a wife and mom and voila I stumbled upon coaching.” Sara had been asked years earlier if she would ever consider coaching, but was in full-on mommy mode at the time with three toddlers and so decided to pass on the idea. “When it came into my life for the second time I took it as a sign that this might be the very thing I was looking for. 14 months later it has turned out to be so much more than I ever dreamed. I have been able to stay consistent with my own health and fitness goals, I am showing my children that taking care of yourself is so important and that it’s never too late to start a new adventure.”

Nintendo Switch – Neon Blue and Red Joy-Con

So Many Benefits

Not only was Sara successful in finding a business that benefited her financially, physically and mentally, but she found joy in the greater purpose it awarded her with helping others to achieve the same benefits. “I have made so many amazing friendships all across the country all thanks to coaching and every day I get to wake up and help women become the best version of themselves. I am so blessed to have found my passion in helping other women and am excited to see where this coaching business takes me.”

Sara had this advice for other mums considering becoming a health and wellness coach. “Go for it. I know it is scary to jump all into something not knowing if its the right fit or if you will be good at it, trust me, I felt the same way. What if I fail? What if I can’t help anyone? What if I don’t know all the answers? But then I decided, what do I have to lose and what if this is the very thing that will change the rest of my life? If we are failing forward then we are moving in the right direction. I would rather say I tried and failed than to have never put myself out there and tried at all. So If you are ready to inspire, encourage and motivate other women while you are working on your own health and wellness, then maybe this could be for you!”

Follow the Journey

If you’d like to know more about Sara’s business ‘Team Burnin it Down’ or would like to follow her success story as an Independent Beachbody coach, you can follow her on Instagram (@sara.impriano) or Facebook.

If you’d like to be featured in our success stories, please visit our T & C’s page for more info, or send us an e-mail at mumlifestories@gmail.com

No story is insignificant. We say that if you feel like a success then you are a success! Your story could inspire and motivate others to forge a path toward their own success story. So please do not hesitate to step forward and share your journey with us and gain recognition and a community of followers at the same time.

Thanks

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Read how a tragedy became Esther Rodriguez’ greatest motivation and pushed her into becoming a successful award-winning business owner.

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